Holly Madison Reveals She Was Suicidal While at the Playboy Mansion

Hobnobbing with billionaires isn’t all luxury and happiness as it is cracked up to be.

In her new memoir Down The Rabbit Hole: Curious Adventures And Cautionary Tales Of A Former PlayBoy Bunny, Holly Madison reveals that life was tougher than one might expect while living in the mansion. So much so, she thought of committing suicide.

Holly once bragged that she and the other bunnies were given a £630 weekly allowance to buy themselves designer clothes and handbags, and that Hugh’s favourite bunny used to get given a Porsche.

Hugh also once gave her a pet monkey as an alternative to the baby that she desperately wanted.

But it turns out that under the extravagance life was not that much fun.

The strict routines, 9pm curfews and rules were so restrictive they left Holly feeling particularly down.

The promotional material around her new book says: ‘Life inside the notorious Mansion wasn’t a dream at all—and quickly became her nightmare.

‘After losing her identity, her sense of self-worth, and her hope for the future, Holly found herself sitting alone in a bathtub contemplating suicide.’

The book is also said to detail ‘oppressive routine of strict rules, manipulation, and [her] battles with ambitious, backstabbing bunnies.’

Recently, bunnies Carla and Melissa Howe described their own experiences in the house.

According to The Mirror, Carla said it was like a ‘prison’ and that ‘When you’re here you have to be in by the 9pm curfew. You’re not allowed to invite any friends up to see you.’

Also, Hugh Hefner’s son, 23-year-old Cooper, recently opened up about what it was like growing up in one of the nation’s most infamous party houses.

Cooper took the press on a tour of the Playboy Mansion. He said that the Grotto, which was reportedly home to many drug and alcohol-fueled orgies, had a much different meaning to Cooper.

As a child, Cooper said he saw the Grotto as some kind of Indiana Jones-style fantasy land, where he imagined himself an adventurer.

But Cooper was kept from some of the seedier parts of the Playboy Mansion.

“We were kept away from the parties while we were growing up when we were younger,” he said. “Like any other 13, 14, 15-year-old if you’re upstairs and your parents are having a Christmas party you’re going to sneak down and try to figure out why you aren’t allowed at the party.”

Holly told the media : ‘I’m excited to finally share my story and what I’ve learned from my personal experiences both inside and outside of the Playboy Mansion.

‘I think my stories will surprise people and I’m looking forward to lifting the veil of mystique and clearing up the misconceptions so often associated with my life.’